Filing Cabinet of the Damned

Friday, February 11, 2005


The Jerkwater Family Cat was recently diagnosed with a benign thyroid tumor. The treatment for this tumor? An injection of radioactive iodine. From what they tell me, it’s highly effective. She got the shot, she’s home now. The side effect? Cat is radioactive for two weeks.

Sadly, not enough to give her giant bat-wings or have her mutate into a giant monster that rampages through Washington and can only be controlled through a psychic link to a ten year old Japanese boy in shorts named “Kenny.” Just enough to make her a bit unsafe, as well as her –ahem- byproducts.

Yes, I live in a house with radioactive cat crap.

I never thought I’d live to see such a day. “Gotta go home, clean out the radioactive cat box.” Gamma ray-emitting cat poop. Wow.

Fear her...for she is ATOMO: THE NUCLEAR CAT!

A strange world we live in, my brothers and sisters. A strange world.


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