Filing Cabinet of the Damned

Monday, March 27, 2006

Upon a Craggy Brow

Yesterday I severed a longstanding link between myself and the comics community.

For fifteen years, I have shared a powerful bond with one of Marvel Comics’ great icons, the Thing.

But no more.

Behold, the bashful, blue-eyed Thing, idol of millions:

While I too remain bashful, blue-eyed, and the idol of millions, I am no longer a proud Brother of the Monobrow. His craggy uni-brow still runs proudly across his rocky visage. Mine is gone. Now I have only a craggy duo-brow across my own rocky visage.

A close personal friend of the Lovely and Delightful Mrs. Jerkwater is an aesthetician, and yesterday offered to cleave my brows in twain via the hot-wax-and-cloth-and-yank-and victim-yelling method. In a fit of madness, I accepted her offer.

Now the bridge of my nose stands naked, exposed to the elements. Now my brows number two. And now my special link to The Thing is gone. Alas.

On the other hand, it has been made known to me that the ladies tend to prefer a man who has not one, but rather two, eyebrows. Thus did I assent to the mutiliation of my manly monobrow.

I’m sure Ben would understand.

(NOTE: That "click here to read more" link dealy is acting strange. Anybody out there in internet-land know how I can have that link appear in posts that are actually split into two parts? Aargh.)


  • I guarantee that pretty soon, you'll find yourself having to go back to the monobrow in order to save a loved one.

    Or, you know, it could grow back.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:02 AM  

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